- I don’t know!
Maybe until I end up in a hospital suffering from exhaustion! I do follow the schedule and I try to fit myself in the 21 list as well, but in the evening I feel ever so tired, I don’t feel like writing anymore.
Tonight I only started reviewing my blog and other blogs approx. at 11pm. By the time I replied to most of the e-mails and read everyone else’s blogs it was one o’clock in the morning! Now it’s twenty past one and I still haven’t finished writing. I will be lucky to get seven our sleep tonight! I know I am doing something wrong, but I will learn and adjust the schedule so everything fits in.
I still haven’t started translating my book and I really don’t like it. Normally when it comes to writing I set myself certain dates so I have some time limits and that is like an extra push to work! Now so far I have gone twice beyond my to-finish dates and once beyond the to-start date! A disaster is waiting to happen.
I learned those ten words today. My memory is pretty good when it comes to languages and I have no problem learning. I will let you know how it’s going at the end of the month.
Today (as you can see) I have taken a picture of my first ever rose that I grew myself! It is truly beautiful and every time I look at it my heart weeps. It is so beautiful and innocent, so clean and free! And it is me who grew it! I am sharing this beautiful picture with you. I feel very generous right now.Some other event today wasn’t as pleasant! I have this thing about spiders. I am not afraid of them while they are busy in their webs or crawling on the floor but when they are anywhere near me touching my skin it is a different matter. In fact the two most unpleasant encounters in my life with the spiders happened in France. I can not compare them but they were both equally unpleasant.
Carra meeting the spider - story no 1. Two and a half years ago I was staying and working with this Irish woman Mia in Brittany. I was helping her round the house, with things like plastering, painting, tiling etc. She in return gave me a room, food and some pocket money. The position I was in at the time wasn’t allowing me to complain or look for something better so I was there, in this room at the side of the house, sleeping on the mattress on the floor. One night while I was on my mattress trying to learn my favourite Shakespeare’s sonnet no 64, I heard this sound … tic tic tic tic tic (really softly) I turned to the right hand side were the sound came from and there it was a huge (in my eyes) spider running up onto my arm. It was reaching my elbow by the time I reacted, jumped up brushed the spider away and ran to the main building to sleep in font of the fireplace. I never slept on the floor or in that room since that event.
Carra meeting the spider – story no 2. Today I was in the loo, doing the thing that most people do in the loo, and as always I picked up a roll of toilet paper to get “prepared”. And there it was Samantha (as my husband named it) in all her beauty falling out of the middle of the toilet paper roll into my LAP! I screamed like I had a gun pointed at me, jumped and ran out of the loo, without looking back. My husband appeared just seconds later asking if I am alright! All I managed to say was “A Spider”. He laughed, and said that I am so big and “poor” Samantha is so tiny and it’s not exactly like she’s got a machine gun on her! I was shamed for being afraid of spiders! I tell you one thing I am not returning to that loo until it was hovered, even though my husband made me feel guilty because he “had” to kill poor Samantha (and her little brother Sam two minutes later)! And she wasn’t big - only two inches!
So here we go:
The reason number one I do not like France: I get “attacked” by spiders repeatedly!
4 comments:
well even when you are tired and exhausted, you are toooo funny!!!
artists generally don't stick to schedules, as i've mentioned before, routine is death to me. I do, however love making lists everyday!! I love to check them off, it makes me feel so accomplished, and it's good, even if it is the same list, over and over, I can start from the end or the middle or the beginning, wherever I like! The whole hourly thing is too much, too much structure like that is not good for anyone, unless they are like my father, obsessive compulsive ;) (only slightly he is that way)
kim
I vote to flush the schedule down the toilet with the spiders!!
I SO share your arachnaphobia....and I know (as your husband so aptly pointed out) how irrational this fear is...but still! If they are doing their own thing, fine. But when they are in my space I freak out and am constantly watching them...keeping track of their position on the ceiling/wall! The worst really is when they are near/on your bed, as with your first story...that is nerve wracking! I can't sleep knowing they are near/on my bed! Are there a lot of spiders in France? Are they big?!
Anyway...it sounds like your schedule is taxing you. Are there ways you can ease up on some things? I mean, you have the rest of your life to keep the house in order right? :-) I know how you feel though...you feel as though you want to be able to do it all and that you should be able to do it all. But it is impossible to do it all. It isn't that you are doing anything wrong...it is just a demanding schedule.
I agree with Kim...as a creative person, I don't do well with rigid schedules, especially the hourly schedules. That makes me feel like a slave to time and that kills my creativity and motivation to live! I too like the idea of daily lists...it still gives you that sense of accomplishment but without being so limited.
I think your eagerness for learning is so impressive. Keep it up...you are such an amazing person!
Oh dear, I don't mind spiders per se but I can't say I would much enjoy one falling into my lap while I'm in the loo. I try to never kill them though, but rather put them outside. Spiders are our friends, our creepy crawly little friends, they eat the bad bugs that would otherwise overwhelm us, like flies and mosquitos. But I know that is easier said than done, and like I said I would rather not find one on my loo paper roll either.
I agree with Kim, schedules are exhausting but making daily lists and checking things off as you complete them can be very satisfying instead.
Five minutes ago before writing this a spider walked out from under the desk I am sitting by and I did not fear. It didn't touch me! The schedule is becoming more relaxed but still a schedule. One good thing about this schedule I make sure I write every night for my blog and that's a good thing! Anyway c'est la vie, I will get used to it or quit simple as that!
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