Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Why is it so bloody hard?

I love writing. I love writing so much it hurts, but sometimes it just doesn't go. I am very sick of the fact that I still write for publications that do not pay me, but I love writing so much I find myself incapable to leave. Now I need an artist. I have needed an artist for Mr. Weatherman for ages, but I can't find one. It pisses me off. Nothing ever goes smoothly it always has to be hassled and held back and so on. Now I am trying to write and my darling husband is mumbling in the background and I can't focus, next thing I know, will be him complaining that I do not write enough. It's bloody hard, being a writer is both a blessing and a curse.


Richard said...

Yuo are blessed to love writing. I, on the other hand, am cursed with the love of dreaming of writing. sigh.

I have spent the last two weeks trying to ween myself of the romantic notion of writing as an indulgence which will shower me with great blessing sand instead trying to look at it as a vocation. A job. Something I have to do. Produce a transient product to be consumed instead a permanent object to be admired.

CG said...

I see writing as a luxury that I can actually afford. It is a treat but it can also be a punishment, i.e. now I'm trying to work on my book, Graham is pressurising me and that is stressing me out. I don't see my writing as a product though, nor do I consider it art, I think of it as a by-product of my existence. I think you should stop thinking about writing alltogehter and just write.

Richard said...

I know, I know. I just keep waiting for when it "feels" right or for my epiphany to come in, or when the cosmos is properly aligned. Stupid reasons for not writing, but the are powerful enough to keep me away from it.

Then I wonder if writing is what I really want to do, since, if it was what I really wanted to do, then I would already be doing it, instead of dreaming about it.

I am trying to write, but I keep falling off the horse.

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