there is nothing in this world that i hate more than hypocrisy. under all circumstances i try not to be a hypocrite because once one starts being one, they can't stop.
now i am the living being that hates being pushed to be strong, but i know i can be, when and only when i really have to. i wish i was this fragile creature that would be treated like a really rare sensitive flower but instead i am treated like a sturdy shed (maybe because i resemble it more?).
i just want not to be hypocrite and want the right things. not to be silly but not be a smart aarse either. not to be weak but not to be quite that strong (unless i really really have to) i just want to be femminine. but liike real feminine not pretend girlie rubbish that i can't pull off anyway. oh i feel so lost.
i know who i am but i don't know how to be me without becoming a hypocrite.