Sometimes I read through the comments I made on other blogs, and so many times my hands start shaking and I feel like pulling out my hair.
Bloody hell!
Over 17 years of studying English and sometimes I can make such stupid mistakes, that clearly shows that for a while I should push the book writing projects in English aside. Oh dear, I am totally disappointed with myself, but at the same time I proud of myself as I do speak other 4 foreign (to me) languages. The tasks that I create to myself of reading classic literature in those languages (I am currently reading C. Dickens The tale of two cities and E. Zola L'œuvre) doesn't help in any way of improving either of languages skills as I do read so many books written in different languages simultaneously.
So what is the conclusion? There isn't one. I don't know what to do, as I want to continue being the way I am. I want to continue learning other languages even though I aim to be an expert only in English, and dream at all times to study in the English language and literature in the OU.
I am totally torn and pissed off with myself. I dedicate a great deal of time just in practicing to write in correct English and result's just aren't there!
The only thing left to me is to be oxymoron and indecisive.
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2 comments:
Mastering another language is no small feat. This weekend, I had a similar conversation with my brother and sister-in-law (to-be). We were talking about the nuances of slang and how difficult those nuances are for non-native speakers of any language.
You are being terribly hard on yourself. But of course, I understand that all too well myself. I think about how pathetic my French is and how badly I wish to be truly bilingual. I guess we just have to be diligent, as that can only help us, right?
I agree with B, I think you are being a bit hard on yourself. When I read your blog I would never guess you aren't a native speaker. Writing comments on other blogs is tricky because sometimes it is only after you post the comment that you realize you made a mistake or that you could have said something more grammatically correct. And then you have to leave another comment to correct your mistake.
The sad part is that I think a lot of native speakers make grammar mistakes all the time, especially in speaking but also in writing. I very often look at my blog posts and am appalled at myself for having changed tenses mid sentence or being lazy with dashes like in the above sentence.
I'm also to the point where I see French people make mistakes in their own language, more often written than spoken. I attribute this to the fact that I have spent recent years studying French grammar profusely, whereas French people, while they do spend many, many years studying grammar in school, it was a long time ago for a lot of them. I think perhaps people who learn a foreign language, such as you learning English, are more tuned in to grammar mistakes than a native speaker, who gets lazy over time or who has forgotten the rules.
All I can say is, thank goodness for spell check
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